Meditations Part 3....

When I say what I would say

Grace catches me

Takes me away from my mistakes

I'm grateful that I'm saved

When I'm tired

He gives me ways to meet the day

Though I can't change the man

He came to clear my slate

Lord Christ

You came to make me a man

And I tasted the hands of the matrix

I crave better

I'm not a slave 

To the rabbit hole pacesetters

So I box myself out the box

Mayweather

He lifts me like a weight

From the world

Sin system that decays

And slips me in his kingdom, the king of

Heaven is my kindred

And he lit a fire

That the devil won't extinguish

Seeing this attire

Of a rebel that's distinguished

The Father sees the heart

So he's settled in his interest

Don't matter if you're gangbanging

Or a man jammin'

Christ loves you

His pledge is for the sin sick

Minister

Simpleton

Not Sinister

Walking the way of this life

Til the finish bruv

And you can ask me  

'What is it's meaning'

And I'll say serve God

Love who he brings to ya

Dreams Part 1...

I didn’t think it was so important to share dreams until a few days ago, but after one of my dreams was fulfilled in a way which affected a lot of people around me. I thought it might be good for me to write down some of the dreams and words I've had because I think they may be relevant in some way to those who read this blog so here goes......

(P.S This obviously overrides the disclaimer from the previous post as these are dreams, not thoughts though it still isn't suitable to be used for doctrine).

________________________________________________________________

A couple of weeks ago I had a dream that I was walking through a pathway to a square where Kirk Franklin (a gospel musician) was doing an interview with Chris Rock (an American comedian). Chris Rock had supposedly become a Christian. I am not a title person or someone who regards the name someone has, so I went up to Kirk Franklin to talk to him like any other person. Yet he had no time to exchange more than a few words. He seemed to think he was better than me, more famous, more known and had no need to be talking with me. He had such a proud look and attitude and I was surprised that he was so rude to me. Anyway I left that place but I saw a large queue heading towards the place I’d just left. I was in the corridor seeing this huge queue to the studio. Everyone was queuing up for a Kanye West concert. I found this kind of strange because I wouldn’t expect they’d be holding a wordly concert in the same place that a Christian interview had just been held but things carried on as if it was normal.

I had another dream, the same night of a famous pastor I’ve listened to in the past, leaving that same studio later frustrated. He was swearing as he went up the hill away from the studio, and seemed to be resolved not to go back. But he was convinced by those who came after him to go back because his sister (who is also a famous gospel singer) wanted to talk to him. As he came back, my mom (who really likes this singer) and her sister were sitting on deckchairs in the studio. My mom was happy because she was seeing one of her inspirations. Then the pastor came to be interviewed by his sister for the television cameras. At that point in the dream I realised, he didn’t come back because he wanted to do the right thing or help his sister out. It was because he knew it was reality TV so he had to act the part. He knew they would be filming and consequently his return and interview was all for the cameras.

I had another dream a couple of weeks ago. In the dream I was at one of our annual church marquees with a few others and they were setting up for the MTV music awards. In the dream I told the people setting up that they couldn’t do that because people from the church would be there and I was concerned that when those from church knew what was going on, they would leave as they didn’t approve nor come to see that. However the show started and the MTV Music awards started rolling. The whole crowd were those who would normally come to the marquee but as the awards were going on, they didn’t seem to notice the difference or didn’t mind.

I also had a dream a couple of weeks ago in which I was in this huge hall which we normally use for church. There was a huge system playing Ja Rule songs and a lot of other popular songs I remember from my past. I began to sing along with these songs and there were quite a few people in the hall who were there just vibing along with the music. Everyone was so into the music, yet I saw in the corner this young lady sitting and staring. She seemed to be a sign of something which was controlling the atmosphere of the room. When I got closer to her I realised it was Aaliyah (the singer who died in 2001). I looked at her, then I looked at everyone in the room who didn't seem to know anything was going on, but continued to enjoy the music. I spoke to her saying 'But your father's not my Father'. She looked to me as if to acknowledge what I'd said as if she already knew, yet all the people in that room that night didn't know it. They were being decieved that it was harmless. Some were Christians, some weren't. Yet the devil was using their ignorance to lead them away from God.

_________________________________________________________________

Obviously these dreams seem to be linked with the spirit of the world battling to enter the church to bring death to parts of it or neutrality, and particularly the last one shows a decieving spirit leading people away from God through worldly things or things from the past which are wrapped up to look harmless. Ignorance being the key to people being taken away. Those who intercede, these are words particularly shared for you to do something with them. Blessings........

Where there's a will......

I just realised the will is such an interesting thing. Now for the disclaimer.


WARNING: This particular post is mainly for getting out my thoughts, pondering life decisions and all that. These posts should not be used to build doctrine. We have the Bible to base doctrine upon. Though Praise God if it helps in any way with the decisions you may be facing. Thank you :).


Now lets get into it.


At the beginning of this week, I was sitting on a ferry on the way back from Belfast when I began to be lost in deep thought (which isn't really a strange thing for me). I have some pretty important decisions to make in a month's time concerning:


1) My living arrangements
2) My working arrangements
3) Whether I will choose to make a covenant commitment to my brothers and sisters in this part of the body of Christ

And also probably other things I haven't thought about....


If you don't know already because of my negligence to say, for the past 11 months I've been doing a discipleship year in a Jesus Army community house. It has had its ups and downs, character churners, times of ecstatic joy, and times of absolute boredom, yet it has massively shaped me into the man God is making me into.


Now, I have to make my choices about whether I will stay on living in one of the church community houses and with that whether I'll continue working for one of the church community businesses. But that's just the minor part. The main decision is the covenant commitment (the other two decisions are directly dependent on this one by the way).


For people who truly understand where I'm at, they would probably ask 'Why is it so hard to make this decision? If you love them it shouldn't be so hard to commit to them in this way, except if your unwillingness is out of selfishness or independence'. The truth is (though it may sound like a cliché or a get out clause), my will and what I want is not the main issue at this moment in time. God's will is.


Now a few days ago when I reasoned things up in my head, by pondering prophecies I've received and where my heart was at, I decided I was ready to make this commitment. As for where God was leading, I didn't really know. But I was hoping he was with me, and ready to take the risk. But when I came back to Birmingham, and after a few conversations with people whom I trust to speak into my life, I began to question how much I'd allowed God into my decision, and what his will was on the matter. Now, why is God's will so important? Especially after I'd made a decision, and the decision seemed good.


1) Because my will is not the same as God's will.

His ways cannot be equated to my ways, even if sometimes my will agrees with his.

2) Because my will can be affected by so many things i.e

i) Wanting to (willing to) do this because it is the done thing. Everyone makes covenant and therefore so must I to prove my heart.


ii) Wanting to do this because I feel high spiritual ties to where I am, and sowing myself into this soil whether God would have me do it or not.


iii) Wanting to do this because I feel high soulish or emotional ties to the people here and I want to stay with them.


iv) Wanting to do this because it will make my flesh die to its ambition and to its independence, despite not knowing whether it's the Lord's calling for me to do this or not.

Obedience and sacrifice sometimes go together, but as the scripture says when faced with the choice, 'obedience is better than sacrifice'. Some may think I’m ‘crazy’ in believing God has a specific word for this, but I remember Solomon's proverb:


Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not to your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your paths.


My will can be a very strong element in a decision, but yet God's will and his purposes are more important and this decision deserves more than a simple ‘I’m gonna follow my heart’. In this instance I must wait, trust and lean on God and allow him to provide direction………And he will……..The Bible tells me so….